Day 14

Happy Mother's Day! I hope every mother out there was able to kick her feet up, even if just for a moment. My day was relaxing (well as relaxing as it could get). The kids decorated my desk and made it my "gift station". It was so incredibly sweet and so was the cards and gifts they made me. Lamont sent me a card from himself, the boys and the girls. Aly and Anthonne made me cards last night and I wanted to share what was inside of their cards. Anthonne's said:

Dear mom,
I hope that you have a nice Mother's Day and that you don't worry about anything today so that you can just relax for today.

And Aly's:

I love you so much you are a great mom. Without you we would be nothing. Dad is gone but you make me feel like he is still here. That feeling is great. I love you so much.

Love Aly L.


Those little words mean a whole lot to me, especially right now. We were able to make it church on time (a big deal for us) where the kids all had a little program for the moms.After church and after a few errands i was able to come home and relax a little. There was still dinner to be made and little things to be done around the house, but for the most part it was a pretty stress free mother's day.

Day 13

I took these pictures the day I took my pictures with the girls. Lamont still hasn't been able to see them, so I wanted to post them here and hopefully put a smile on his face.
Just to update everyone on how Lamont is doing, he is now at Fort Jackson training with the Army and learning their ways. It is a very different experience to go from Navy to Army and especially with only 3 weeks of training. He is adjusting though and I couldn't be prouder of him. We are planning a trip to see him next weekend. I'm going to surprise the kids and pack their bags while they are at school, pick them up and drive down to SC. I can't wait to just have him in my arms again....they feel so empty these days...

Day 12

This morning I was treated to "Muffins with Mom" in Mayson's classroom. It was very sweet and I loved everything about it, well everything except having to be there by 7:15. I have never claimed to be a morning person, so this was a struggle for me, but I climbed out of bed at 6, got myself and 2 kids ready, and headed out of the door by 7. It was totally worth it to see the smile on Mayson's face, and to see the wondeful gift he made me. So please excuse the red puffy eyes I am sporting and enjoy the pictures of my first muffins with mayson ;)

I also wanted to note that Mayson has been wearing that necklace since yesterday and doesn't want to take it off for anything. It just so happens to be daddy's necklace
:(

Day 11

Mother's Day it's on it's way and my sweeties have been working hard on my gifts!This is Mayson's gift to me, the prettiest little flower pot with his thumb prints on it as "clouds" around it. He made this for me last night at church and was so proud to show me. I honestly started to forget it was this weekend...not that Lamont has to be here to celebrate it, but he has helped the kids with some amazing gifts in the past. My favorite being the year I woke up to the kids making me breakfast. Once they were done, Lamont played the song "A Song for Mama" by Boyz II Men and had taught the kids most of the words so they could sing it to me. It's the small things like that that keep me loving that man. That is a memory that I will keep in my heart until I'm old and gray.....and I thank him so much for that. I wanted to share that song with everyone. So go pause my music player and take a few minutes to listen to this song. It is a tribute to any mother and it truly means so much to me now.

Day 10

Here is gift #2...my daughter Alyxandrea. She is ten years old now, although she looks 16 (I get that all the time!!). She is a super sweet, super sassy girl who is alot of fun to be around. She looks just like her daddy (although as she gets older I think she's starting to favor me more) and her whole heart belongs to her daddy. I know she misses him so much and I all I can do is pray that she knows how much he truly loves and misses her too.

Day 9

I decided this year to give myself a Mother's Day gift. The gift of pictures with each of my babies. It's something that I don't get to do often, and I really wanted to be able to look back one day and remember when it was just the five of us. Before girlfriends/boyfriends, husbands and wives. Before life takes them away from our home and all I get are the occasional holiday pictures, or birthday wishes. I know it will all happen sooner then we would like, but for now they are just my babies.

Here is my first gift to, Ysabella and mommy. We had a fun day of girl time. I straightened my hair and then hers for the first time. She loved it, and I loved seeing how happy it made her. Daddy might get mad at me, but I know he'll love the pictures too much to get too upset ;)

Day 8

So one of the things i was nervous about when Lamont left was that I am going to have a teenager this summer! Yes the thought of it is so scary! I mean don't get me wrong, he's a good kid, but a teen is a teen. Lamont and I are pretty old fashioned about alot of things. Sadly kids nowadays get cell phones as early as they can, which works for some people but not us. My son isn't away from home long enough to even need one, but we are considering it for his birthday this year. We are slowly trying to allow him the little freedoms that come with being a teen. So this site that I captured yesterday falls into those little freedoms. Anthonne got a call on MY cell from one of his female friends. No i never let him go beyond ear shot, because I wanted to make sure the conversation stayed age appropriate. Maybe i'm paranoid, but kids are growing up way to fast nowadays and i just want to make sure mine stays his age for awhile.

Day 7

Well we have survived a whole week so far and I feel very accomplished! I miss him every single day, but I feel everyone's prayers and God's strength with us right now. I remember last year when I was going through this I just fell apart, I mean from day one I was a mess! But this time has been different, I just have to take control over our situation and make the best of it. Keeping busy is one of those things that truly helps, so when my good friend Isabel invited the kids and I over for pool time and dinner, I was there! We had a blast and it was so nice to relax and enjoy good friends and good food!

Day 6

Communication is a gem when you are separated from your loved ones. It's all you have, it's what you look forward to everyday. We are so fortunate to be able to talk to Lamont everyday, whether it's on the phone or on the computer. Our favorite times are when we both turn on our webcams and we all get to just enjoy seeing eachother and acting goofy with the kids. It's truly the best part of my day. I love seeing him smile, that smile that has control over my heart!

An amazing family

I frequent a celebrity baby blog often....okay well everyday. Yes I am addicted, but through that I was given the blessing of coming across an amazing family who is ministering to people through their pain. Sometimes when you are hurting it helps to hear stories of how other people have been able to deal with their hurt and loss. I will never try to compare my situation with the one of this family or anything like that. But I do feel a sense of loss everyday and I do want to be able to walk through this and be a better person in the end. The moment I started reading the story of the Smith family I knew God had sent me into their lives via the internet for a reason. They are a family who have recently suffered, in my opinion, one of the worst pains in the world...the loss of a child. But it's what they have have done with this pain that is truly amazing. They have chosen to bring people to God through this, through the life of their little angel Audrey Caroline. I encourage you to please check out the blog that mom Angie Smith has created in memory of her daughter. It will minister to any situation you may be going through.

http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/


Also please take the time to watch this video about their family. It is almost 30 minutes long, but I promise you will forever be changed afterwards. I have found new strength and faith by just allowing myself to be captured by their story and to see the tenderness and honesty they have allowed us to see in them.
http://www.vimeo.com/951902/

Day 5

TGIF all the way! We are almost a week down and just like baby steps i'll take the small accomplishments right now. For my picture(s) of the day I wanted to share our trip to Busch Gardens from March when Lamont's mom and sister came up to visit. I know this will bring a smile to his face because it was a great trip and we had a blast! It was the first time in our marriage that we had his mom and sister here at the same time and then the added bonus of having his neice living here just came together to make a wonderful visit. We had so much fun that day. We got to ride all of our favorite coasters and even got to ride the Griffon with all of us (me, Lamont, his neice Malisa, Anthonne, and Aly) sitting next to eachother. Let me tell you there is no other bonding experience then dropping 205 ft going 70 mph at a 90 degree angle!

Lonely...

It's the one word that describes me tonight. I promise all of my posts won't be sad and depressing forever....but with it just being the first week, well that is just the appropriate word to describe how I feel right now. I've been so lucky to be able to talk to Lamont everyday either through phone calls or instant messenger. It is the best feeling to see him over the webcam but then the longing to be able to touch him takes over and it leaves me with sadness. I miss him to the core, and most of all I just miss his presence in our home. I know that is something that won't go away over time, it will just be another thing I will have to learn to live without. I just want so badly for time to go by fast and for him to return to us safely.

Day 4

We were lucky to be able to have my mother come visit right before Lamont left. One of the best things that came from her visit was her watching the kids overnight so Lamont and I could have a night to ourselves. It was so nice to just have it be just him and I. We started off going to the movies where I ended up falling asleep on him several times, there was hardly anyone in the theatre....i'm sure me falling asleep isn't what he had in mind! Then we went back to our hotel room and started getting ready for our night out. We ended up going to Guadalajara's where we had dinner (their nachos are amazing!) and then stayed to dance. It was such a wonderful night and it broke my heart when I saw the suitcase still in our room the night he left. Here are our snapshots from the night....just enjoying it being him and I.