Day 10

Here is gift #2...my daughter Alyxandrea. She is ten years old now, although she looks 16 (I get that all the time!!). She is a super sweet, super sassy girl who is alot of fun to be around. She looks just like her daddy (although as she gets older I think she's starting to favor me more) and her whole heart belongs to her daddy. I know she misses him so much and I all I can do is pray that she knows how much he truly loves and misses her too.

Day 9

I decided this year to give myself a Mother's Day gift. The gift of pictures with each of my babies. It's something that I don't get to do often, and I really wanted to be able to look back one day and remember when it was just the five of us. Before girlfriends/boyfriends, husbands and wives. Before life takes them away from our home and all I get are the occasional holiday pictures, or birthday wishes. I know it will all happen sooner then we would like, but for now they are just my babies.

Here is my first gift to, Ysabella and mommy. We had a fun day of girl time. I straightened my hair and then hers for the first time. She loved it, and I loved seeing how happy it made her. Daddy might get mad at me, but I know he'll love the pictures too much to get too upset ;)

Day 8

So one of the things i was nervous about when Lamont left was that I am going to have a teenager this summer! Yes the thought of it is so scary! I mean don't get me wrong, he's a good kid, but a teen is a teen. Lamont and I are pretty old fashioned about alot of things. Sadly kids nowadays get cell phones as early as they can, which works for some people but not us. My son isn't away from home long enough to even need one, but we are considering it for his birthday this year. We are slowly trying to allow him the little freedoms that come with being a teen. So this site that I captured yesterday falls into those little freedoms. Anthonne got a call on MY cell from one of his female friends. No i never let him go beyond ear shot, because I wanted to make sure the conversation stayed age appropriate. Maybe i'm paranoid, but kids are growing up way to fast nowadays and i just want to make sure mine stays his age for awhile.

Day 7

Well we have survived a whole week so far and I feel very accomplished! I miss him every single day, but I feel everyone's prayers and God's strength with us right now. I remember last year when I was going through this I just fell apart, I mean from day one I was a mess! But this time has been different, I just have to take control over our situation and make the best of it. Keeping busy is one of those things that truly helps, so when my good friend Isabel invited the kids and I over for pool time and dinner, I was there! We had a blast and it was so nice to relax and enjoy good friends and good food!

Day 6

Communication is a gem when you are separated from your loved ones. It's all you have, it's what you look forward to everyday. We are so fortunate to be able to talk to Lamont everyday, whether it's on the phone or on the computer. Our favorite times are when we both turn on our webcams and we all get to just enjoy seeing eachother and acting goofy with the kids. It's truly the best part of my day. I love seeing him smile, that smile that has control over my heart!

An amazing family

I frequent a celebrity baby blog often....okay well everyday. Yes I am addicted, but through that I was given the blessing of coming across an amazing family who is ministering to people through their pain. Sometimes when you are hurting it helps to hear stories of how other people have been able to deal with their hurt and loss. I will never try to compare my situation with the one of this family or anything like that. But I do feel a sense of loss everyday and I do want to be able to walk through this and be a better person in the end. The moment I started reading the story of the Smith family I knew God had sent me into their lives via the internet for a reason. They are a family who have recently suffered, in my opinion, one of the worst pains in the world...the loss of a child. But it's what they have have done with this pain that is truly amazing. They have chosen to bring people to God through this, through the life of their little angel Audrey Caroline. I encourage you to please check out the blog that mom Angie Smith has created in memory of her daughter. It will minister to any situation you may be going through.

http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/


Also please take the time to watch this video about their family. It is almost 30 minutes long, but I promise you will forever be changed afterwards. I have found new strength and faith by just allowing myself to be captured by their story and to see the tenderness and honesty they have allowed us to see in them.
http://www.vimeo.com/951902/

Day 5

TGIF all the way! We are almost a week down and just like baby steps i'll take the small accomplishments right now. For my picture(s) of the day I wanted to share our trip to Busch Gardens from March when Lamont's mom and sister came up to visit. I know this will bring a smile to his face because it was a great trip and we had a blast! It was the first time in our marriage that we had his mom and sister here at the same time and then the added bonus of having his neice living here just came together to make a wonderful visit. We had so much fun that day. We got to ride all of our favorite coasters and even got to ride the Griffon with all of us (me, Lamont, his neice Malisa, Anthonne, and Aly) sitting next to eachother. Let me tell you there is no other bonding experience then dropping 205 ft going 70 mph at a 90 degree angle!

Lonely...

It's the one word that describes me tonight. I promise all of my posts won't be sad and depressing forever....but with it just being the first week, well that is just the appropriate word to describe how I feel right now. I've been so lucky to be able to talk to Lamont everyday either through phone calls or instant messenger. It is the best feeling to see him over the webcam but then the longing to be able to touch him takes over and it leaves me with sadness. I miss him to the core, and most of all I just miss his presence in our home. I know that is something that won't go away over time, it will just be another thing I will have to learn to live without. I just want so badly for time to go by fast and for him to return to us safely.

Day 4

We were lucky to be able to have my mother come visit right before Lamont left. One of the best things that came from her visit was her watching the kids overnight so Lamont and I could have a night to ourselves. It was so nice to just have it be just him and I. We started off going to the movies where I ended up falling asleep on him several times, there was hardly anyone in the theatre....i'm sure me falling asleep isn't what he had in mind! Then we went back to our hotel room and started getting ready for our night out. We ended up going to Guadalajara's where we had dinner (their nachos are amazing!) and then stayed to dance. It was such a wonderful night and it broke my heart when I saw the suitcase still in our room the night he left. Here are our snapshots from the night....just enjoying it being him and I.

Day 3

So it's day 3 and although I am keeping busy, I still feel very alone. My mother was here for the past week and I had to take her to the airport this morning so that was tough. She was such a great help and I really appreciate her coming here to support us. I wanted to share a few pictures I took of Lamont and the kids this weekend. We went to the beach for the first time this season and just enjoyed running around and being together. We all love the beach and spend most of our summers there, so this was fitting to be able to take Lamont there before he left. We really tried to do alot of things we knew he would miss while gone. I miss him so much already, i'm really trying to keep my mind focused on the positives and not become consumed with sadness.

I love you sweetie and seeing these pictures make me love you even more. I hope they bring a smile to your face...

Day 2

Right now i'm playing catch up with my pictures, so eventually I will be posting pictures I took that day. I wanted to post the pictures Amber took of us as my photo today because they are so beautiful. She came up from NC a week before Lamont left and it was very busy in our home (as usual) so we only had one day to do our shoot. We chose my new favorite location and we both put on the outfits we wore for our anniversary party. The mood was so solem for these because I knew that they would be the last pictures I had of the two of us. I am very grateful for them though, and want to send out a sincere thank you to you Amber. You know these will be treasured by us for a long time!

Day 1

So the time has come for me to start my photo a day project. I had wanted to start with pictures that my good friend Amber took of us before he left, but I felt like I needed to start with the pictures I took of him at the airport yesterday. I'm sure I don't have to describe how we all felt yesterday knowing it was the last day we had with him. We got up in the morning and went to church and knew the moment we got there that it was the right thing to do. It was an amazing service and it ended with us recieving a huge blessing and finding peace with all of this. From there we went to breakfast and just enjoyed eachother's company. When we got home Lamont had to take care of a few things and before I knew it it was time to take him to the airport. When we arrived at the airport, Aly gave her daddy a present to take with him. It was her lion webkins that was dear to her heart, but she knew her daddy would love it. Then it was time for the goodbyes, i watched as Aly held onto Lamont and didn't want to let him go. It tore at my heart knowing she was feeling the same way I did, knowing that when she let go it would be the last hug for a very long time. You just stand there holding them, smelling them trying to permanently embed that memory in your mind so you'll have it for those times when you miss them soo much. I know he was feeling the same way, and I know this is just as hard on him as it is on us. We joked on the way to the airport that one day when we are laying in our bed, in our dream home that we will look back at all of this and see how much our marriage has survived through all of this. We will know it was all worth it in the end, and I will hold onto to that thought during those times when I need him the most..

A photo a day...

Will start on Monday the 28th. Lamont will be leaving on Sunday so I plan on starting my 425 day photo challenge on Monday. This week has been a challenge to say the least! We are all trying to hold on to every little moment, while knowing it is our last for a long time. Lamont has been so sweet with the kids. He surprised the boys by taking them out of school early to go to the movies, and he's taking Aly out to breakfast on Thursday. Words cannot describe how much I love him and how proud I am of him. He will be missed on so many levels! The first picture I will share on Monday will be one that my good friend Amber took of us this weekend. So check back on Monday and everyday after that to follow my challenge!!

New blog!!

Hi everyone,
I haven't been on here as often as i would like. I'm hoping that will all change when in 2 short weeks, my honey will be home!!! I'm so excited and I can't even fathom how good it's going to feel to have my family in one peice again. Life will be back to some kind of normalicy, and that alone will feel so good! I have worked hard to keep my business afloat and there has been many times that I just wanted to give up. But I always had friends there to let me know that quitting just wasn't an option, and because of that I have had alot of blessings. So now I have decided to start a photography blog so that I showcase my work for all of my friends and my clients. So here is the link...go check it out!

http://mayaphotographyblog.blogspot.com